Willing to be Illuminated and Pierced

Posts tagged ‘personality’

Answers Without Filters

My ultra introverted self has awakened again. I intentionally did not join the team at our company Christmas party. I honestly hate parties but what I hate most is partying with noisy, carefree self-labelled socialites dancing with a glass of fake campaign. 

It seemed I was born with Frank Senatra and Nat King Cole serenading me because I prefer quiet, coffee shop dates, painting pictures, reading books and lots of me time. Like my mom, I’d like to observe other people quietly, clam up my thoughts to myself, free up mental space from the jeje crowds and spend more time away from the colorful personalities that regress my opinions and thoughts. Sometimes, time is best served with self.

But I don’t know why unusual characters surround me. I wonder if my friendly aura or smiling face gives away too much. I am sometimes bothered with weird people who stress me too much. Perhaps I was entertaining them too much. 

A former officemate would message me from time to time to ask if he could borrow money. I’d politely say I would try next time, although I reallt don’t have much. It came to a point that he asked me if I had the money (yes, that casually). That was when I was triggered to say I was struggling financially, I can only budget my money for myself. Should have I said that in the beginning, he would not have relied on me. 

Perhaps, I need to be a little more straightforward to others. I’ve been acting too nicely for a long time. It’s time to tick my brain to give answers without filters. 

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Perfection From Imperfection

Imperfection irritates most of us. I’m sure, all of us have come to a point wondering why we’re imperfect, wishing we got the qualities that others have. But I believe there is a purpose to our imperfection.

It has been said that there are dangers to being perfect. It can make us arrogant, as if don’t need God and man. I’m sure you’d expect me to say that we are made imperfect so we would depend on God. Yes, that’s true. But more than that, I believe that in our imperfection, we are also taught to love others, as well.

I learned this in our prayer group, whom I always stay with every weekends. It’s not a perfect group, each of us have qualities that the other wouldn’t like. There are times that we would be offended to one another. But together we grew, and through each other, there are some qualities in our characters that have been sharpened or filled. When one needs help, like a prayer request or advice, the other would share a piece of wisdom that may be of help. Sometimes, a constructive criticism or rebuke can awaken us from flaws that we have. A word of encouragement brightens a part of ourselves that could be wearied. It’s like that some of us have a missing puzzle piece that only that other can fill.

I have heard of church fights and church splits so many times and the reason that I could hear is due to out of offense of their leaders or other churchmates. There are no perfect churches. Each of us is a broken jar. When we cast aside our bitterness and pride, we can see the value of each other and help mending the character of each other. Though we may be right at one point and the party that offended us are wrong, rebellion is a sign of pride. Instead of reacting in bitterness, why not pray for that person’s welfare? I believe, each of us needs to be covered in prayer, and it can uphold the character of the person we pray for and molds us to love others dispite of the offense done to us.

Never question God why we are made imperfect. In everything, there is a reason that only He understands. In time, we will know how this imperfection molds us to become better in love, humility, and righteousness.

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Attack of the Friday blues

Here I am sitting in the empty working press area in Malacañang Palace. It’s a Friday, and the other reporters were just waiting for the early hours to wane along until it’s time for our daily press briefing. I usually love sitting alone while waiting for nothing, but a part of me sulk for not tagging along with President Aquino in China.

So, I am part-adventurer-part-bum. My dual personalities are so contrast that I wonder why my body does not tear itself in half. I’m no Jekyll or Hyde. But I guess these extremities make up the unique mixture of my personality.  Besides, it does not trouble me, since it can make me adapt to any extreme situation that may arise. Nice. 🙂

By now, Fridays like these causes me to lay back and stare…the week’s about to end and the fun is about to start. Oh, well, I’d better keep my adventurous side until next week…or until the President’s return. 🙂

Ah…Fridays…I love to lay back today. But I still got news to cover, although I’m sure we’ll be infected with the Friday sickness that would make us long for this day to end. 🙂

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