Willing to be Illuminated and Pierced

Archive for February, 2014

Stale Wine

When you hate the thing you love
The dream turns away
Leaving you a nightmare
Pulling you to the bottomless pit

Who should I blame
For the loss of the spirit of the wine
Would I not but leave the wine press
And kill this very vine?

My wine was poisoned by reason
Of a senseless throng of misdirection
But all I wanted was affection
Could you not be a connection

Make me leave this wine press
Or I will be poisoned and die
And leave not a legacy
To change a world of dry bones

Destroy, destroy the old cellars
Build me a new vineyard of hope
And make me drink again with passion so pure
Take up a new road to turn again

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Love Off the Virtual Space

‎”Do you already have a boyfriend?”
I know there is nothing wrong with this question but it irritates me at most times. It’s OK to ask it if you’re really curious and we’re familiar with each other.
Rather, it’s being asked by not-so-close people…and they’re boys.
For me, it implies something, especially through social media. It’s an off question. And it find it as a really strange question.
Asking other single lady friends, it seems that most of them encounter boys who ask (and even court) on social media. That question is an introduction. The biggest turn-off is when they ask you if you this next question:
“Can you be my girlfriend?”
Girlfriend? Do we know each other that well? Are you sure we’re meant to be? And why ask through social media and not personally.
Why should I entrust my heart through someone who proposes through virtual space? How sure am I he’s true on his word?
The Internet can be used as a mask to hide one’s fears while pretending to be brave enough. Rather, I’d appreciate those who take time and courage to tell his feelings personally.
You can say I’m a very idealistic woman. Let me just say that I don’t have time to flirt. I pursue real love through commitment.
For me, a sign of a committed man would really pray about his relationship and would not try to pry on single ladies through social media.
Love is not a betting game. Which lady bites the bit is his. That is the game of most men today. But this is not true love.
True love goes hand-in-hand with commitment and sacrifice.
To go into a relationship requires these two elements, as each one has to give up something from themselves for the sake of their partner.
As I’ve heard in a testimony of a couple on TV, “Love is not only a feeling. Love is a commitment.”
Indeed, it is not a fleeting moment, just like a shoutout or a status on FB or Twitter.
And I can’t afford to take time on fleeting moments.

Aging Better Than Wine

IMG_0765[1]I can’t believe it was my birthday last Sunday. Surprised, not because it is a special day, but because it is an ordinary day that it was supposed to be special.
I tried to make it as special as it could be but the day ended without something surprising. I tried to console myself by the greetings through social media. Add it up with my mom’s spaghetti and cake. But it does not mark anything at the end of the day.
I wonder if this is the sign of aging. When people tend to expect more but receive less.
When everybody around you is too busy to buy you a gift.
When we realize that there are only a few people who love you as you are.
When age is not counted but dreaded.
In my 29 years of existence, I never felt so deprived. The child in me rebels. But the adult in me tries to justify.
One by one, I realize I am just being stripped off from the unnecessary fringes in life. The noise of parties, the prominent people who pretend to be close, the pride of life, all these vanish through season.
I then see who are left by my side, which are only a few.
But the greatest, though not the most accepted fact, is having the Lord.
He’s the firm foundation. Take everything away, but in Him I have it all.
No need to ask for a flower, a cake, or an expensive gift.
Maybe what I should ask as a gift is for me to become a completely strong person, filled with His love and Spirit.
Thus, I shall age better than wine.

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